Monday, 11 January 2016

Hustling and how not to fuck it up

As some of you know all too well, I have the distinct luxury of being able to pick and choose my who I do and who I don't do business with. There is a certain liberating comfort knowing that my products usually end up in the hands of those that appreciate them and not in the hands of utter wankers. To this end I operate a list of persons that for various good reasons, I wouldn't even piss on if they were on fire let alone take their money for one of my products. One such raging douchebag is a reprehensible little shit called Daniel Simmonds. A little back story if I may, to fill in why this prick ended up on my shit list. A few years ago, this individual ordered several items from me but I was then contacted on several occasions by his mother Adrienne explaining how this spoilt and over-entitled brat had hacked her Paypal and email and using her stolen details, made these purchases. Obviously, being the type of chap I am, I cancelled these orders yet this nasty, thieving shit refused to take no for an answer and continued to try and obtain these items despite being rumbled and even on one occasion, impersonating his mother using her hacked email address and stealing her credit card to set up a duplicate Paypal account. If there's one thing that winds me up it's badly behaved fuckers who steal from their parents thinking it's their god given right to have nice stuff.  (If anyone can be bothered I have the original emails detailing all of this so if he denies it, I'll just go public with those too, I don't give two fucks).

Fast forward 4 years and it would appear that not only has Simmonds grown up, he's graduated into conning other Doctor Who fans. Let me give you a quick run down of his current shenanigans.

He recently posted the following ad on a Facebook Doctor Who group:

One of my extensive network of trusted friends that keep an eye on these things for me thought the whole thing smelt 'wrong'. For a start, Simmonds isn't what you call bright. He has this sociopathic tendency towards economy with the truth and spins a rather fantastical yarn in order to try and con the maximum cash from said lies. Case in point is with the 11th Doctor sonic here:

The picture he then posts my chap are of a slightly different sonic to the one he advertised on the board. The latest pics shows a grip that has a larger screw hole in the white handle like the latest production Rubbertoe sonics and now apparently it has parts from a screen used sonic on it! (In case that was lost on some of you, I'm currently rolling my eyes and I have developed an itchy rash on my chin). Now, for a start I happen to know that the parts in question have not been swapped out and are still on the original S5 sonics. Even if they weren't he'd need the collusion of Nick Robatto and Nick is not that stupid. Simmonds has replicated said features from knowledge that is already in the public domain and he's using this to fraudulently bump up the price. Which is kind of funny as the other guy 'Dominic' that Simmonds refers to is also one of my friends and he was never told about the screen used Frankensonic nature of this sonic and indeed, Simmonds quoted him a lower price. Go figure.

But it gets a separate conversation with 'Dominic' to buy the pictured Ultimate Edition 10th sonic a whole new web of deceit has been spun. Consider the following:

Not only has he now concocted a story about how Nick Robatto has repainted one of my Ultimate Edition 10th Doctor sonics, he's now turned it into one of his 'prototypes' and Simmonds wants £1250 more than it originally cost! Now I'm not going to accuse Nick of any wrongdoing here. Far from it, I don't think Nick would go anywhere near one of my sonics for obvious reasons let alone collude with a lying psychopathic cunt like Simmonds. Simmonds is using Nick's name as a convincer to basically add value to a sonic he's tinkered with himself and if I was Nick, I'd be fucking furious. 

So what is the lesson here? Basically, don't try and hustle in a market place where I have eyes and ears everywhere. There is a lot of loyalty and a lot of love for me in this hobby but I like to keep it on the down low as it serves my needs. If you try and pull a fast one, the chances are I will know about it within minutes and I will make you look stupid. If you are still hell bent on going for the con, do it in intelligently and with style. Simmond's attempt at being a Jewish Frank Abagnale just makes him look like an inept bunglecunt. For the rest of you readers...if you are looking to buy anything from this piece of shit, take everything with a healthy pinch of kosher salt. 

Saturday, 4 January 2014

A new beginning.......

As another year fades into history and before the new one begins in earnest, let me wish all my readers, customers and followers the very best for the coming year. I know, it's a bit late but I've been a bit busy here in China setting up some amazing things for you all this coming year so bear with me.

2013 was an eventful one marked by quite profound change both on a global scale and on a personal one for me since it's really been the first year I've thoroughly enjoyed myself doing what I do best and finally garnering some small degree of acceptance that has allowed me to settle within a comfortable niche within this field. 

2013 was the year many talented makers have fallen by the wayside, victims of the insidious march of 3D printing, recasting and disillusionment whilst others have sprung up in their place.

The industry itself has changed, fuelled again by the increasing use of 3D printing and the cartel like grip some makers have on the cool shit we see onscreen but change is good as it fuels some really ingenious new techniques and use of materials. I've certainly learnt my fair share and hopefully, when some of my stuff hits the big screen in the summer, we'll see how successful me and my team of CTs have been.

The past year saw me finally finish my 11th doctor sonic build. Just in time for the 11th Doctor to mercifully leave our screens and a new one in the form of Paul Smith model extraordinaire, Peter 'I'll fucking stab ye' Capaldi. Oh well, can't rush perfection. It took 3 years but I finally got there.

2013 was also the year that the hobby of props has seen a real sea change, both for good and for bad. The RPF, that old go-to, has contracted the online equivalent of AIDS and is about to go full-blown. The days where the hobby was driven by the pro's helping out a few skilled amateurs to recreate the icons they saw on screen was finally are well and truly consigned to history. Instead, the hobby has been replaced with an almighty clusterfuck which is all the doing of a single clueless inbred imbecile called Art Andrews. His vanity, boundless stupidity and complete failure to grasp the fundamentals of human interaction has led him on an ill conceived quest to own the hobby. He wants to package the hobby, the content and the members, skull fuck them into brain dead submission using fear and fake beneficence then use that as a commodity on which to sell advertising. 

However, the game is up. He has been rumbled, his stranglehold is broken and despite trying to silence the dissenters through bans, social media ignore buttons and good old fashioned fingers in the ears, his little empire is crumbling. The spate of bannings in the past week will mark the moment the castle walls cracked. High profile, respected members of the prop world and of the wider fandom have been summarily banned just because they associated with people outside The RPF than Art deems a danger to him. These are people, like myself, you just don't make enemies of. The disgust that these bannings have had have reverberated throughout the community. People are renouncing their RPF memberships, getting themselves banned and just leaving the place in support of those banned. This exodus is terminal and palpable. One look at the RPF compared to even 5 years ago will show a huge decline in quality of posting, sharing, camaraderie and overall activity. Those that made the original RPF what it was have long gone and instead Artis oversees a shitpit of kids, scammers and general fucktards. In fact, the natural habitat of cunts like Risu. 

Art's enemies are circling, they have rallied against him and they have put aside their enmities to unite to save this hobby of our's against a greedy psychopathic tyrant who wants to own it.

To this end, I'm going to be doing something a little different this year with this blog. Instead of it being exclusively my own rantings and mad raving, I'll be offering this blog to you guys as a venting outlet and will be featuring guest bloggers throughout the year to talk about not just Who props, but props, fandom and life in general. You'll have a treat as there are some great writers lined up, some which you'll know already and some you'll get to know.

So as 2014 finally gets underway let's pause and reflect on what has gone, the propmakers who are with us, and some not with us, and some looking down on us, and look forward to the changes that will come. Some people will look forward to these more than others but this year will undoubtedly be memorable. Happy 2014 everyone.

Tuesday, 31 December 2013

What is this? Your farewell speech?

I notice that our chum Artis is a fan of Glengarry Glen Ross. He's used a totally inappropriate quote from that film in a pussy attempt to make himself look good. The hilarious thing is that he is not a 'greater power' nor did we fantasize about finding information that will out him as a hypocrite. He posted the fucking proof on his own Facebook wall! Using that to dump on him made me feel like I'd slept for twelve hours.

If he wants to trade quotes, here's a few from the film that I found much more apposite:

"That guy's a fuckin' asshole. Anybody who talks to that asshole is a fuckin' asshole."

"You've got a big mouth... now I'm gonna show you an even bigger one."

and last but not least:

"You stupid fucking cunt. You, Andrews, I'm talking to you, shithead....That's right. What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it, asshole? You're fucking shit. Where did you learn your trade, you stupid fucking cunt, you idiot? Who ever told you that you could work with men? Oh, I'm gonna have your job, shithead."

Monday, 30 December 2013

All I want for Christmas is.....a hanky

There exists among us a different breed of person. This person is cold, calculating, immoral, manipulative, unhindered by guilt, empathy or common decency. They suffer from a condition that psychologists term 'Antisocial Personality Disorder'. We know them as psychopaths. 

These people create a web of deceit and psychological coercion in order to exert a control framework over the poor weak minded fools that they encounter. In the world of fandom, Art Andrews is such a creature. An unapologetic sociopathic nut job whose monumental ego and innate inadequacies as a human being has lead him on a campaign of entitlement where fandom is commoditised and controlled by him and his brainwashed cronies.

A couple of days ago, I publically dismantled this hypocritical fucker on this blog. Most people, especially one as universally despised as this douche,  would use this as a catalyst for some pretty hard self reflection and consider why so many people want to see him hit with a mortar round. Not Artis. Instead, he posts the following, rather oblique response on an OT topic on The RPF:

Once I had staunched the bleeding from my heart, I considered this rather limp dicked response and had to take another break for some surgery to have my sides sewn back up.

Let's look at this objectively. Here is a fuck face who just got publically shat on. He hasn't got the stones to take me on man to man so he resorts to bleeding heart, woe is me, let's be the better man bullshit. It's feeble, transparent and utterly ineffectual because a) I'm not the type to give a flying fuck and b) because I can smell his fear. For all the bravado, I've struck a nerve with this spineless little turd and he's bricking it.

On the little corner of the web where we congregate, his former friends, enemies and amused bystanders can finally see through the holier than thou spiel and we laugh at him. As my buddy Larry observed is his inimitably arch way,  "Right, because Christmas is traditionally the time of fellowship and good cheer, which is the natural environment for scum. What an inbred, damaged soul."

Couldn't have put it better myself. 

But moving on, it's easy to see what he's trying to do. He's playing to his self styled 'cult leader' image and giving the impression that he's serenely floating above the slings and arrows that his outrageous fortune has slung at him. 

To be fair, at least we're hitting the mark. If it were him firing the slings and arrows they'd probably end up in his own leg so maybe this passive strategy is probably for the best, from his point of view.

Seriously though, the response is as hollow as his nutsack. What a presumptious douche to assume he owns 'this community'. The community is larger than The RPF and sister sites. Fandom cannot be owned, it cannot be commoditised and it cannot be dictated to by an intellectually retarded little trailer park hick with a track record of self harm.

'Promoting peace' is not achieved by the hypocritical imposition of bannings, censorship and intimidation. It is achieved through honesty, intelligent discourse, reason and tolerance. Concepts that Artis' miniscule conglomeration of grey matter has difficulty grasping. 'The community' is not owned by any one person, it is owned wholly and unequivocably by the members. The RPF is not a community, it is a dictatorship and as history has shown, dictatorships seldom last. His 'rules', as Shawn McBee and countless others have shown, are as meaningless and fluid as the juice that sloshes around between Art's ears. Rules are only as effective as their application and it has been proven time and time again that Art does not and cannot apply his rules equitably or consistently. It is a measure of the bottom feeding pissant he is that whenever called on it, he puts his fingers in his ears and goes 'la la la'. This is the guy to whom loyalty is alien. This is the guy who banned Prop Den from The RPF despite all the help it gave him when The RPF got hacked. This is a guy who has driven from The RPF guys who hitherto considered him a friend. Tell me, do you want a cunt like that vetting everything you see and post? 

Some of you reading this will probably think I'm full of shit. Many more I hope, will agree with me. I hope I have done something to lift the curtain on Artis' shitty little operation. If you have an RPF membership, renounce it. Reclaim your mind from this bullying, manipulative fuck. Stand up for free speech and mature unfettered discussion, free from Art's thought police. There are plenty of alternative sites out there where you can discuss props, get the 'good stuff' and generally hang out with some of the coolest guys in the business. One such site is The MPPC run by Lee Malone and you can sign up here: The MPPC

The RPF is heading for a fall. The choice is simple. Art Andrews has grown too arrogant and too complacent and it is stifling this community. The prop community is YOUR'S. Not his. YOUR'S. Reclaim it and we can all benefit from the wealth of talent, creativity and friendship that has been stifled for too long.

Update: In the few hours this blog has been up it would appear that our buddy Artis has seen it and posting the following comments on his Facebook wall for his sycophantic wank buddies to comment on

Funny how he cropped out the statement professing his love of the schlong. It's also quite telling that he is pretending to act amused and unbothered by this when it is obvious to everyone, his skull fucked bum buddies included, that the opposite is true. He is HIGHLY bothered by this. So Art...what are you going to do? You going to BAN me? (Manic laughter) You going to sue me? (More manic laughter) You going to pray for my soul? (Ok, I'm out of manic laughter and I'm just going to sit here dribbling). I'm going to keep on prodding you until you finally break and shoot yourself again. I'm going to dismantle your little toy forum and I will ruin you personally and professionally. I'll let your church ruin you spiritually as quite honestly, they are doing a fucking great job already. 

The sad truth is that Artis has made a lot of enemies. Enemies he did not need to make. He will continue to 'ban' people who dissent. He will continue to make sad pathetic faces when he whines about how he is wronged by everyone, misunderstood by those who cannot see his higher purpose, profess to be a humble man of the masses. Sound familiar? Yeah.....and when the time comes, I hope that when they nail him to that cross it really fucking hurts.

Artis will to ignore/block/ban anyone who challenges his narrow little world view. But the World Wide Web is, thankfully, not controlled by Artis. It's controlled by the NSA. And they're not about to ban me anytime soon, so happy days. I'll leave you with this. A few days ago Art posted this bleeding heart whine:

"I received a number of PM's yesterday from people saying they wanted to join in the conversation but were afraid to post their remarks publicly. This really makes me sad. We live in a world that claims we are all equal and there should be tolerance for everyone's views... but clearly that is not the case. If you are one of those who doesn't feel you can speak your mind, I would be interested in hearing why not? Do you fear reprisal and being ostracized? Do you not think others would be accepting and tolerant of your beliefs? For those who DO feel comfortable responding to hot topics, like yesterday's debate which included Biblical beliefs and discussions regarding homosexuality, why aren't you afraid? Do you just not care what others think? Are you not worried about reprisal? I am very interested to know what separates those who feel they can't speak their mind from those who feel they can."

Remember Shawn McBee wrote a rather cutting and well reasoned response? He got blocked by Art. 

Well, Marc De Hoogh also got blocked by Art for posting this:

So much for my baseless accusations. That cunt proves me right each and every time. He will continue to bury his head in the sand whilst those with half a braincell to their name will run for the hills. This banjo plucking bumpkin is finished. Be part of the joke or you can laugh at the joke because either way, there is going to be a lot more laughs to come.

Saturday, 28 December 2013

The Art of Hypocrisy

There was a time, not so long ago, when a little known British comedian called Ricky Gervais was actually quite funny. His acutely observed and brilliantly executed comedic inventions that poked fun at the type of hapless, ignorant and generally rather unpleasant sorts you would encounter in the real world has made him quite the master of this type of comedy. David Brent from 'The Office' is his masterpiece. He is an irritating fuck: vain, pretentious, intellectually limited and utterly oblivious to his own limitations and the contempt that he engenders in those around him.

Speaking of irritating fucks, allow me to re-introduce you to one of the most irritating fucks you will ever have the misfortune to encounter, Mr Art Andrews (his friends call him 'Cunt').  This douchebag is possibly the dumbest fucking cunt ever to walk the face of this planet. This self styled overlord of multi genre fandom has single-handedly managed to royally fuck up and fragment a hitherto rather united and friendly bunch of like minded fans and collectors and replaced it with a bunch of kids running around in foam costumes.

His main claim to fame is The RPF, a cesspool of fucktards, moderated by cunts and controlled by King Cunt himself. Having alienated the real pro's, the big collectors and the knowledgeable movers and shakers within the prop world what we have left are idiot children playing hooky from remedial school, third string cosplayers in Made-In-China Ebay costumes, sycophants and Adam Savage. Hardly the winning recipe for a credible business is it? Anyone who could have added credibility to the forum has long departed: either the victim of one of Artis' arbitrary bannings or have fucked off on their own accord to sunnier climes in disgust over Artis' rather psychotic moderation policies.

To give you an example rather close to home, I present you with the following:

For the past 5 years I have been banned from The RPF. I am not allowed to be mentioned, alluded to, hinted at by name, reputation or even have pictures of my products without attribution posted. Hell, even a pic that contains one of my products in the background is reason enough for a ban. Even the letters 'C' and 'T' are not allowed to be used (ok, I was joking about the last part but it's not outside the realms of possibility; stranger things have happened)

You wonder what he's afraid of? I admit, I'm a pretty scary dude but on a good day I'm actually quite mercurial and reasonably pleasant. The lunacy of the situation is bordering on the surreal. Consider this if you will: you have a forum that is called the Replica Prop Forum. But you're not allowed to talk about the producer of some of the best props around. How does that work? Beats the fuck out of me. The irony is that I have made hero props for some of the biggest films in the past two years yet they are allowed to be freely discussed. However, if Art were to ban these threads, there will be nothing left to discuss. These spineless chickenshits need to grow a pair as the only message they are sending out is that they are crapping their pants if I so much as even breathe in their general direction. Personally, I don't care if they villify me. I'm a big boy and it will take more than a bunch of brainwashed dickcheeses to bother me, but when they start victimising and harassing my friends and customers, I get pissed.

Art Andrews has become everyone's problem in the prop world. He's a cancer that is eating away at the bedrock of fandom. Whenever a power hungry simpleton like Art achieves even a modicum of success, he starts to think he's Jesus and that is when free speech, free expression and freedom of thought become a page note in his book of masturbation. Personally, I would not trust Art to organise a gang rape on an Indian bus. His ineptitude is the stuff of legend. This is the fucking moron who shot himself in the leg with his own gun whilst cleaning it. This is the fucktard who, along with that boned headed goon Gino, dumped 10 kilos of silicone over a priceless screen used Fett helmet. This psychopathic knobgobbler surrounds himself with professional retards because it's the only way he can muster the collective braincells to work a computer. He even married a dozy heifer who walked onto a plane with a loaded gun, post 9/11.  He is a joke. A laughing stock. No one takes him seriously and those that do were probably lobotomized at a young age. His name is a byword for shoddy gun handling, bad personal hygiene and ridiculous clit tickler facial fungus. Look at him and tell me that God doesn't write funnier gags than Bill Hicks?

Proof, if proof were needed, of the hypocrisy and complete lack of self awareness that this cuntflap exhibits can be found on his own Facebook wall where he recently posted this gem, this beauty, this gold nugget of comedic genius:

"I received a number of PM's yesterday from people saying they wanted to join in the conversation but were afraid to post their remarks publicly. This really makes me sad. We live in a world that claims we are all equal and there should be tolerance for everyone's views... but clearly that is not the case. If you are one of those who doesn't feel you can speak your mind, I would be interested in hearing why not? Do you fear reprisal and being ostracized? Do you not think others would be accepting and tolerant of your beliefs? For those who DO feel comfortable responding to hot topics, like yesterday's debate which included Biblical beliefs and discussions regarding homosexuality, why aren't you afraid? Do you just not care what others think? Are you not worried about reprisal? I am very interested to know what separates those who feel they can't speak their mind from those who feel they can."

My initial reaction went from disbelief, to shock, to sidesplitting laughter. The complete obliviousness to the hypocrisy this cunt displays defies explanation. This was something that even David Brent would find hard to do. In case some of you don't get it, let me put it in simple terms. This is the turd who has systematically suppressed free speech through censorship, fear and intimidation on his own forums. He has banned people for even talking to someone who he feels threatened by. His bannings are arbitrary, his intellectual functioning is non existent and his testicular matter is minimal. If you aspire to be a cult leader, that puts you at an immediate disadvantage. How can he expect to gain, let alone keep, the respect of his devotees when he is patently an incompetent imbecile?

One of my customers and Twitter followers posted the following in response on Artis' Facebook page:

Little I can add to this except "Bravo". Now Artis has painted himself into little corner. He can ignore it and keep the comment up there, in which case his hypocrisy is there for all to see. He could remove it. Which would prove that he is the virulent little pustule we all know he is. Either way, he loses. NEWSFLASH: Since speaking his mind, Artis has BLOCKED Shawn on Facebook. Proof again, that this brainless little cockknuckle has all the intelligence of a skidmark and answered his own question. The lesson today comes from the Gospel of St CT: Never ask a question if you don't like the answer. What a stroke.....

Speaking of censorship, he recently had a pop at Facebook for censoring and banning his band of retards for posting objectionable pics.

Whoah, hang on there. You mean Artis just got a taste of his own medicine? It's ok for him to ban people for NOTHING yet Facebook are jackasses for doing the same unto him? Well...karma's a bitch right Art?

As of today, I urge every one of you who still remains a member of the RPF to reclaim your mind, reclaim your self respect and reclaim your right to think for yourself instead of wallowing in the scummy mire of Art Andrews' hypocrisy. Get out of the cesspool, and tell Art he does not control who you associate with, who you buy from and whose party line you have to tow. Tell him to fuck off, tell him that you refuse to associate yourselves with a business where fear, intimidation and brainwashing are used to control you into being a commodity that pads out the bottom line of a fucktard who cannot even strip a gun without shooting himself.

The RPF is a sinking ship. It's not longer a resource to be valued, rather a place to point at the brainless peasants and laugh. I urge you all to boycott this clusterfuck of a forum and let the dogs suck the marrow out of it. Art deserves nothing less than to be King of a crumbling castle. You can either watch from the sidelines smugly or you can forever be part of the legacy of woe that Art will leave. Choose wisely my friends.

Tuesday, 20 August 2013

Risu's Return

This is my first blog entry in just over a year. Coming back to something like this after such a protracted absence is daunting. It's not as if I've really been away either as those of your who regularly interact with me via Twitter or Facebook will know that I've actually been a pretty busy boy. To be blunt, the last entries in this blog a year ago, revolved around taking chunks out of an idiot called Dan Stokes (known online as 'Anakin Starkiller') and that whole distasteful business left an exceedingly acrid taste in the mouth. Despite my rather obvious talent for it, I'd rather not berate, belittle or bully anyone unless I find their behaviour either exceedingly stupid or just plain and misguidedly wrong. In both instances, Stokes just excelled and instead of just accepting it, decided to argue. Again, a monumentally stupid move given I held all the cards. So, instead of expending my ever pressed resources on arguing with Stokes and fucksticks of that genus, I decided to concentrate on doing what I do best, knowing that my work willl speak louder than any wanker of a detractor. 

To that end, the blog took a haitus, my career has, to put it mildly, come on in leaps and bounds and I've finally reached the finish line in regards my rather definitive 11th Doctor sonic screwdriver. It is this particular replica, or rather the events that have arisen from it that is the subject of my ire today.

It is generally accepted that certain things within this universe that we inhabit are constant, fundamental and pretty much undeniable. The axioms upon which our reality is founded span the disciplines of mathematics,  physics, geometry and philosophy, to name but a few. The way in which any online discussion of sonic screwdrivers invariably descends, double quick time, into an unmitigated clusterfuck being yet another, less anodyne truth. But now we can add another: stupidity. Not just any old stupidity, mind. It is a stupidity so deep, so magnificently ill conceived and so logic defying, it can only originate from that primeval pit of eternal stupidity that we only know as Daniel 'Risu' Pawlik.

Yes, him. Our old chum, purveyor of crap 'replicas', humourless blowhard, professional runt and Doctor Who wannabe in a cheap knockoff suit. A knobgobbler with all the skill of a blind dyspraxic rent boy with Parkinson's. Not content with the virtual beatings I have dealt upon him over the years, he has carved out quite a niche for himself as a laughing stock, a byword for comical ineptitude that has sent even the most forgiving and patient collectors running for the hills, screaming for mercy. 

And I have shown mercy. Despite his numerous cheap pot shots over the years, which I have ignored, I have refrained from pressing the button and permanently squash this irritating little fuck, until now.

Let me give you a little background. Earlier this year my team and I finally completed our prototype for my replica of the 11th Doctor sonics. These beauties here:

A little background behind these: these were based directly on the 4 screen used props that I had access to and differ significantly from the replicas that Nick Robatto made for QMX. In short, these are about as accurate as you're ever going to get and even more so than those made by Robatto. In addition to accuracy, one of the major issues that has taken me over 2 years to rectify and solve is the issue of fragility. The filming props were flawed in that they often broke from the flicking action that is needed to open it. Despite numerous vehement denials from various parties, this has been confirmed from multiple unconnected sources who have seen first hand, at conventions, the rather horrible habit of the upper cage detaching and flying across the room when flicked. Mainly because I am an extremely clever bastard, I have redesigned my sonic replica internally to allow you to do this:

So where does Risu come into all of this? It is well known I am an extremely choosy seller. The almighty dollar has never been my primary motivation rather the pursuit of the perfect replica has driven my little enterprise. Having a little fun a long the way and shining a light into the dark ignorant corners of fandom has proven to be a welcome side effect as well as some of the wonderful, loyal and charming friends I have made along the way. That is as it should be. However, the flipside is that I have also made a lot of enemies and as a rule I don't sell to enemies, dickheads and thieving cunts. Which leads me quite nicely to Risu.

About a week or so ago, I received an email from a good friend and customer of mine asking me if I had heard about Risu and Bob Mitsch's run of metal 11th Doctor sonics, copied directly from the Robatto QMX. 

It is a pretty major rule, some say fundamental, in the world of prop replication that you do not recast or copy another maker's replica. Even if that replica is by the original maker and is a replica of his own work, unless you have his blessing. Let me give you an example from the world of Highlander: Sal D'Aquila produced the Season 1 katana. He later sold a subtly modified replica of it as the 'Musashi' katana. It is pretty obvious that buying one then recasting it and selling it is a no-no. However, a grey area exists if you somehow got hold of the original screen used prop and started selling replicas based on that. Ok, Sal may not be happy about it, but tough shit, it's up to Davis Panzer to deal with but within the world of prop replication, it's fair dibs.

A week ago, Risu posted the following on the Gallifrey Base forum: (click to enlarge)

Mitsch dropped a hint that there was a run in the offing (knowing full well he was one of the instigators). Risu couldn't help himself and replied on the same thread with "it's actually closer to $700 range, but yea (sic), it's in the works. And it'll be the best ever"

Conveniently overlooking the rather juvenile and nauseating hyperbole (seriously "it'll be the best ever"????? When this incompetent fucker has neither a track record in producing anything that is 'best ever' except for steaming turds, nor has a prototype to show or even any reasons for why it will be the 'best ever') this doesn't really appear to be very incriminating. 

So let's see the smoking gun. Feast your eyes on these private messages that one of my customers sent me:

Makes for some pretty grim and damning reading doesn't it? This fucking idiot is not only singing like a canary to some random internet agent provocateur, he's also landed his buddy Mitsch in the doo doo and admitted that what we've known all along, he's been sucking up to Robatto in order to extract enough info to copy his replica. Hmmmmm, classy. I hope Nick tells that cunt where to go. Who fans can be a bunch of cunts at the best of times but when you combine cuntishness with an unimaginative lack of resourcefulness, you end up with cheap fucks like Risu.

Not only cheap, but a recasting scumbag to boot. I can certainly sympathise with him to an extent. When you have a maker whom you despise  but is the only maker of a replica you badly, badly want though refuses to sell to you, it puts you in a rather interesting quandary. You either bite the bullet and try and obtain one through illicit means (of which more later) or you try and compete. Being the utter halfwit that he is, Risu decides to do the latter, deludedly declaring to the world that "it'll be the best ever". In your frigging dreams Twinkletoes! In order to produce 'the best ever' you need several things:

  1. Skill - Risu is about as cackhanded as they get. He can't even cast, in effect, a resin brick. Let me explain: a while back on The RPF, this utter donut managed to get hold of a screen used bar of silver from Looper. He decides to cast them in resin and sell them in the Junkyard. He has absolutely no idea about how to mould or cast them in silver which effectively leads to more experienced guys puppywalking him through the process and spoonfeeding him info on the correct resins and pigments. He then has a brainwave and decides to fill the casting with lead fishing shot, conveniently overlooking the strong possibility of shrinkage and cracked castings. What a fucking tool. To cut a long story short, it takes him nigh on six months to produce a handfull of resin bricks of a quality from 'fair' to 'middling'. Kevinericon then bails him out by producing a much better metal version in a shorter space of time.  The point? Would you trust your money to a retard who is teaching himself as he goes along?
  2. A keen eye - I have been pointing out Risu's [lack of] ocular acuity since the year 'dot'. I would rather trust Stevie Wonder to make observations about props that Risu. Either his eyes are shonky, or brain is. Personally I think it's a combination of both. Recently he proudly declared  "Honestly, and I say this having looked at both in hand, the quality of machining on the wand sonic is better. Especially the teeth. They actually fit together. Nobody's done that as well in the past.". Until someone pointed this out:

Which is puzzling since a) he owns one of my UE's and b) even The Wand Company admitted their teeth are incorrect. 

Given the above, it is laughable that this turd refers to my 11th sonic as 'garbage' and 'crap for a number of reasons'. Now what reasons would they be Mr Risu, I wonder? Given that this blind piece of shit wouldn't know garbage even if it shat on his head from 50 storeys up, any idiot can see that my prototypes are about as accurate as it's possible to get. The picture of the four above even fooled a great many people who thought they were pics of the props in their case. I have proven to a number of trusted confidantes that my replica has been referenced from the screen used props. And Risu? All he has are a few pics of the 'ugly duckling' screen used prop from the exhibition and a QMX Robatto replica which is wrong in several areas.

What makes this idiot think that he can re-engineer the sonic to make it more durable (a notion that I have been pushing since I began this project two years ago) with sound in three months when an industry pro like me, with a team of the finest propmakers working in the business, has taken the best part of two years to do? Personally, I'd just let him get on with it and laugh when he falls over and lands in the shit.

Forgetting Risu's limitations as a propmaker, his limitations as a human being are even more striking. This is a man whose innate shadiness is matched by his complete lack of intellect, envy and bitterness. A recent example of this was when he asked Ray Remillard, an owner of a Belstaff Milford 'Sherlock' coat, to borrow a button from the coat:

His purpose? To dump a load of silicone on it and sell recasts. Shameless. At least I had the class to buy a coat and 3d scan the buttons before using a cnc to machine them out of horn. What a twat. This fucker knows what he's doing is wrong. Why else say "This run was never meant to be brought up on the forums"? He's not assembling these things 'free of charge'. I know how much these things cost to make as I make them and this little shitbag cuntflapper does nothing for free. He's probably making enough to both fund his own one or pay the guy who is lending them the QMX sonic. I love how he tries to rationalise what he's doing by saying that he's not interfering with an existing licence as QMX are no longer selling them and that it's only a small personal run between friends. Well, if that's the case, why doesn't he just ask QMX if it's ok first? Why the need to keep it on the down low? Just because QMX aren't actively producing goods under the licence, doesn't mean they have lost the right to. They still have the right to do it and he's infringing upon it, let's make no mistake. And as for a small run between friends, that's too funny. He was ready to sell to anybody that shows an interest. I'm no angel but I'm honest in my outlook, I make no bones about what I'm doing isn't strictly by the book but I have the benefit of Chinese government protection so I have no need to fudge my corporate message. Risu? He's a crooked lying little fuck with a mini penis and a deluded sense of self worth that is utterly at odds with his rather underwhelming physical appearance.

Let me show you some correspondence that one of my customers forwarded to me recently between himself and Risu:

Hey man, I just wanted to try to explain the situation a little better, but I can't do it in the public forum. The member that is being referred to is (ABSOLUTELY NO MENTION OF THAT UNLICENSED SELLER IS PERMITTED ON THIS FORUM, EVER). He currently makes the only sonic available, and that's not good for anybody. He's rude, hateful, and at times threatens violence against anybody who disagrees with him, or happens to get caught in the crossfire. For example, he targeted me years ago for calling him out on his rude language toward other board members, and over a full year after everything had calmed back down, he was still reading my posts and commentating on them on his blog. He would call me out on anything he could, and after one of his many lackeys started a whole new bunch of drama with me, he posted a request on his twitter for somebody to find me at a con and break my legs. The reason nobody is allowed to mention him or his products on either forum is because he and his far too loyal customers will find any mention of him and find a way to incite a riot. After the tenth time, they finally made the new rules.

It feels to me like pressing the issue is just an attempt to put a stop to the group run, and that's probably what's about to happen. Even if that wasn't your intent, the argument you've started and what you've said so far might very well put an end to all group runs on this forum. You may not have realized it was headed in that direction, but I don't see how pressing the issue could do anybody any good.

Thanks for that. What I have not had an answer to is, did this person actually say anything on this site to anyone? As I can't see any ref to that. Perhaps you can help answer that? 

I could be wrong, but from what I have read this person has said things on his own blog, but not broken any rules HERE. If not, how can he be issued with a banning order for NOT breaking rules here on GB. 

I don't know why he attacked you or anyone else, & sorry to hear that, but why did he pick on you? Please don't take this the wrong way, but why pick on you out of 100's of us out there? Did you & others say something to start it. Only asking because you know what they say. No smoke without fire etc. Like I say no offence, just asking.

Another question I have & I know you can't really answer, as you haven't set the rules... but OK the member is banned but why can't he or his props be talked about? The trouble is from what I have found out, his props seem to be the best out there. Better than any official licence replicas & most seem to have them. This means that costumed photos at cons with his replicas in hand can't be taken & uploaded as well as photos of collections as that would lead to a banning of any members that publish! Crazy situation don't you think. 

As for banning group runs, well they ARE bootlegs too & we have to be honest about it. If GB has banned a member for illegally producing replicas (if that is THE real reason) then yes they have to do the same with group runs. It would be hypocritical of them not to. The rules have to be the same for all of us & only GB can change that.

He was only banned for the conduct. The forums have to be delicate about things thing group runs and unlicensed replicas. It's kind of an unspoken thing with license holders. Members are allowed to produce small runs of items without being issued a cease and desist. With CT, he mass produces them in China. But he wasn't banned for that, it was just a tenuous issue that made the mods nervous. As for taking pictures of his sonics, people are free to do so as long as the sonic isn't the focus/they don't go talking about how it's a CT sonic.

I can't remember exactly what went down on GB because I was mostly just an RPF member back then, but I think he was briefly a member here as well. He was banned from both forums, but here's exactly how it happened on the RPF. He signed up, started posting about his in development sonics. A couple people very politely suggested some alterations to improve on accuracy and he flipped out. He started calling people c***s, etc. (this is where he latched onto me, because I posted to tell him he was out of line. He attacked a few others as well, but eventually let them off the hook because they publicly apologized to him, which I still refuse to do) Anyway, he was quickly suspended from the RPF for his language, and that's when he started posting to his blog. He posted rants about the RPF and it's specific members, pulling our real names and pictures of us from our Facebook pages, posting libel about a few of us that was searchable on google if you typed in our names. In some cases they became the top results for our names. The moderator of the RPF found out about the blog, read the posts, and immediately permanently banned him. It wasn't until much later that the no mention of him rule came about, which as I said was because any mention of his name or products was riling up his supporters and causing them to start flame wars. To keep the forum running smoothly they had no choice but to set up the rule, and things have run pretty smoothly ever since. I think Shaun over here followed suit with that rule because he didn't want the same thing happening over here."

Stirring words, aren't they? Pity that they have no basis in reality. To put the record entirely straight, I was banned not for using 'bad language' but because I refused to take the petty envy and the snideness that was directed at me because, a) I was new to the forums and b) I stood up to the childish bullying that Risu was part of. Risu never apologised and continued to make snide remarks about my products, claiming inaccuracies etc when that fucker wouldn't know the first thing about accuracy. All my claims have been PROVEN. Time and time again. My initial detractors were neither polite nor informed. They simply were not qualified to criticise on accuracy because they had never been as up close to the prop as me. That's simply the way it is. Was I rude? Sure. But I had earnt the right to be especially to deadheads who thought they were fucking experts and Risu was one of the worse. He still knows fuck all.

My UE sonic came onto the market 2 years ago based on the Tennant B prop. It is only now that things have come out to confirm just how accurate it is. My 11th prop replica is no exception. What makes Risu's claim even more absurd and surreal is that recently he has shown that he owns not one, but two of my supposedly shit replicas. A fob watch and one of my UE sonics! That he was waving it around like a halfwit at a recent convention not realising that one of my customers "Captain K" was right next to him. So....let's get this right. This is a toolbag who supposedly thinks that my products are shit, yet owns two of them and was inspired to copy my ideas and price point by producing his own competing product? Yes Risu, we believe you have no hidden agenda. 

In spite of everything above, I do believe that what we've got here is a failure to communicate. Risu simply does not understand that you cannot take me on and expect to get away lightly. His stubborness is commendable but ultimately he has caused his own destruction. His first encounters with me have dented his credibility yet he didn't have the intelligence to quit, apologise and move on like some of his friends. Subsequent encounters have made him a laughing stock and still he thinks he can go head to head with me and expect to come out on top. So, as much as it pains me, this time Risu is finished.  I just hope this has made him realise a few home truths and if he comes out of this broken, so be it. He'll rebuild, stronger and hopefully less of the turd he's spent his life so far being. Somehow, I doubt it will happen though.

Addendum: Inspired by Risu, I have decided, forthwith, to adopt his observations as my corporate advertising slogan. What better endorsement for a product than to have it slated by a simpleton with dead eyes? Don Draper, take note.