Thursday, 30 September 2010

Sonic Screwdriver Vs Bus

As you well know, I don't sell my sonics with any kind of warranty against abuse, stupidity or just sheer bad luck: I just build them to the best of my ability and let nature and serendipity take its own course.

However I would like to share something that happened last week that amazed me no end and as with all good tales, this one also involved a sonic screwdriver.

I was down south last week on business and decided to pop over the border to Hong Kong to catch up with some family and friends during the Mid Autumn Moon Festival.

As some of you who have visited already know, Hong Kong is an odd place and is one of the few places in the world where jaywalking is still an offence punishable by a stint in the stocks. Ok, I was kidding about that bit, but it is still a crime where your collar can and will be felt if the strategically placed Rozzers at the pedestrian crossings catch you at. The result of this crackdown on pedestrian waywardness is that everyone (and I mean everyone), only crosses the road at designated pedestrian crossings where the metronomic tick tock of the lights suddenly speed up to sound the all-clear for vast swathes of humanity to run the gauntlet in 20 second intervals every 3 minutes. And god help you if you aren't possessed of the swiftness of foot of Usain Bolt and don't make it across in the alloted window, as time and Hong Kong traffic wait for no man. In fact, Hong Kong traffic waits for no one. Me included. 

Which brings me onto my little tale. There I was, walking along in the early autumn sunshine, minding my own business when I felt the overwhelming urge to cross the road. Spying the nearest pedestrian crossing I saw the green 'safe-to-cross' light flashing and heard the rapidly increasing tick-tock cadence signalling the rapid evaporation of my allotted 20 seconds. So like any decent amber-gambler, I legged it.

About halfway across, the vigor of my less than graceful sprint caused my sonic screwdriver to fly backwards out of my breast pocket and in a graceful arc, land onto the tarmac where it bounced once and then lay at rest in the middle of Nathan Road. The realisation of this made me turn my head and my eyes traced its flight through the air, in slow motion, and I screamed 'nooooooooooooooooooooooo' (again in x0.2 speed so it sounded, in my head at least, particularly deep and manly) before making a pitifully futile attempt to pluck it out of the air with my hand but as I was pegging it with all the urgency of a black slave from a Klan lynch mob, momentum and time was not on my side and no sooner had my foot reached the opposite kerb then the lights changed and the waiting traffic accelerated off.

My sonic screwdriver was then run over by one of these:

My poor sonic disappeared under the wheels of this beast. The next three minutes were amongst the longest of my life and as I waited for the tick tock to speed up again so I could run to the middle of the road and inspect the damage. Truth be told I didn't expect to retrieve anything but the earthly remains of one pancaked Eccleston sonic but for no other reason than I think someone upstairs is well keen on me,, not only was sonic intact, but it was still working!!!!! Here's what it looks like:

Minor dint in the bulb:

The head has taken a couple of dings, but trust me when I tell you the original prop is in far worse shape:

...and here's the how the Perfetto faired. Not bad considering it's been run over by a bus:

I'm going to leave the battle scars on as I feel they add a certain character to the prop. Not many props can say that they've been run over by a bus and survived in full working order. It was certainly an eye-opener for me.