Tuesday, 17 May 2011

Say hello to my little friends

It's official. As of 9.00am yesterday morning I have become a fully paid up purveyor of crack. Before the more delicate of sensibility amongst you start tut-tutting away at CT's apparent deviant diversification into the world of illegal recreational stimulants, I should quickly stress that the crack I am refering to is totally legal but like its illicit namesake, it is no less debilitating on body and soul.

As regular followers of my rather rambling and often disjointed belles-lettres here in cyberspace will know, I have had a bit of a Elmer Fudd/Bugs Bunny saga the past 6 months. The object of my pursuits has been the industrial crackle that I announced last October. Since that moment it has been, to be frank, a fucking millstone around my neck. The sheer number of occasions I have regretted this utterly moronic decision on my part in the past six months has swelled the family swear box and spurred in me a renewed resolve for keeping my big mouth shut in future. The reason for this new found emnity towards a paint coating is that this has not been the simplest of things to development and even less simple to apply. If you've followed my updates, you will have seen the buckets of failures, the pics of me at stupid-o'-clock in a freezing paint shop in the depths of winter spraying these fucking things, continually cursing-to-damnation the sheer futility of trying to standardise a bastard 10 layer/20 process paint coating all in the name of bloody-minded oneupsmanship. However, like with all endeavours where impossibility sneers at you from the other side of the abyss, sheer stubborness, luck and a bit of lateral thinking eventually paid dividends and the result is this....

Pretty lovely looking aren't they? These are pretty much as good as they will get. The paint coating is as hard as nails. It's a totally custom paint, developed by me and a coatings chemist which replicates the hardness and durability of real ceramic. It is also the true colour of the prop for most of its life. Forget the whole 'Heritage Gold'/'Colony Cream' debate from last year when I spanked Neill Gorton's botty and sent him running back to Auntie (who promptly took away his licence), the props were (with the exception of the Aztec which really, genuinely and unequivocably was 'Colony Cream') this shade of 'just off' white with any change in colour caused by a mixture of dirt and yellowing of the clearcoat.

Just how tough is this bastard? Here's what I had to do to even chip it:

That small amount of damage was made using a chisel. That's how tough this stuff is. Now I do not advise you to go around smacking your spanking new limited edition sonics with a chisel. Well, you can as it's your's, but don't come bawling to me as I will laugh at you. You'll just have to take my word for it.

So, how do you get your mitts on one of these beauties? Go to my webstore and fill your boots. But get a shift on. I am only making 20 of each model and most have been pre-sold last year. As of the time of writing, the Tennant ones are practically gone with only a handful left but a larger number of Eccleston versions are still kicking around (where's the love for Eccles????).

Thank you to those that pre-ordered last year, you'll be getting your's shortly in the post.

I am assembling them this week and they will be going out this weekend in the order they were ordered. I can only assemble and test 3-4 per day so please be patient, you'll get them and they will be glorious.

In the meantime, here's some extra pics that didn't make the site.